27 SLEIGH RIDES (2019)

Let's say you've got some people at your house for the holidays and they just won't go away.  What do you do when that happens?  Well, why not crank this sucker up and put it on repeat?  What is it?  It's pretty much 27 versions of the song "Sleigh Ride".  If that doesn't drive those boneheads out of your house there's a huge chance that nothing ever will.  Nah!  There's no reason to thank me.  Consider it a gift from me to you.  Have fun, be happy, and I'll be back with more tunes next year.

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YOUR MOM'S ASS CHRISTMAS (2019)

 

Here we have a bunch of very safe and happy tunes for the whole family.  Well... not my family so much but I'm guessing it would work fine with yours.  Why not try it as background music during dinner and see for yourself?  Pass me some more 'taters, Ma!  And don't forget the gravy!

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PARTY ASS CHRISTMAS (2019)

Here's a new one for ya!  Feel free to kick back, relax, and have yourself a nice mug of whatever it is that you have a nice mug of when you are kicking back and relaxing and having a nice mug of something nice in a nice mug when you are kicking back and relaxing nicely with a mug of something nice and relaxing.  In a Mug.  Me?  I've already had three or four of them!  YEEHAW!  Hey!  It's Christmas party time, man!  Why not enjoy yourself?

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WEIRD ASS CHRISTMAS 3 (V.2) (2018)

Wow! It's a trilogy! How about that, gang?

Retooled and re-edited for 2019.

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RUDE ASS CHRISTMAS (V.2) (NSFW!) (2014)

WARNING! NOT SAFE FOR WORK!

(depending on where you work)

This mix is very rude, what with all the cussing and the violence and the swearing and the sex and the cursing and the not loving Christmas and the profanity and such. Your mom probably won't like it either. However, if she does like it be sure to have her give me a call, okay?

Retooled and re-edited for 2019.

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WEIRD ASS CHRISTMAS 2 (V.2) (2016)

 

Here's some more weirdness for you, gang! See? It's got a "2" in the title. Do you know what that means? It means that it's the second one. And that means more. It's pretty simple if you think about it, right?

Retooled and re-edited for 2019.

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WEIRD ASS CHRISTMAS (V.2) (2015)

Here's a little something for all you chestnut headed fruitcakes out there, a whole entire mix of nothing but wacky ass tracks, ads, and such. Try this one while hanging out in your rubber room. Trust me, you won't be sorry.

Or will you?

Retooled and re-edited for 2019.

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A KMART IN STORE CHRISTMAS TAPE (1974)

Somebody made a copy of an actual tape (remember tapes?) that was played over the speakers (remember speakers?) in Kmart stores (remember stores?) while people were Christmas shopping way back in 1974. There's both music and some announcements about sales and the like. Myself? I tend to think of it as a pop culture artifact. You just might consider it a rather lame ass waste of time. Whatever, Trevor.  It's not like you had to pay for it or anything.

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HOT ASS CHRISTMAS (2018)

While looking on line for holiday photos I stumbled across this beauty (see above) so I threw together a Christmas mix and made a fake album cover to go with it.  Is it art?  Is it pornography?  Is it a cheap joke?  It's Christmas, baby!  Just roll with it. 

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COOL ASS CHRISTMAS (2016)

Some jazz and blues and stuff like that.  Rather snazzy, very nice.  What else do you need to know?

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ANOTHER KICK ASS CHRISTMAS (V.2) (2016)

Man! Am I tired of writing these blurb things or what?

 It's Christmas music, okay? You'll love it or you won't. Would you like me to write you a novel while I'm at it?  See the guy screaming at that office party?  That's exactly how I'm feeling right now!  Geezuz!

Retooled and re-edited for 2019.

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SWEET ASS CHRISTMAS (2016)

Here's some warm and fuzzy stuff to get all cozy with.  Not bad with some cookies and milk.  Unless you happen to have an allergy to gluten and are lactose intolerant or whatever.  In which case, you might want to go for some apple slices and a glass of tap water.  How the hell would I know?

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JAZZ ASS CHRISTMAS (2015)

It's jazztastic, hep cat!

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KICK ASS CHRISTMAS (V.2) (2009)

My very first Christmas mix, slightly tweaked and updated for your very own listening pleasure.

Retooled and re-edited for 2019.

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CHRISTMAS SAMPLER (2018)

Curious about what goes on here?  Why not try our exclusive CatCo Christmas Sampler?  It's skinless, boneless, and chock full of chupacabras and guacamole, just like grandma used to make! 

It has been hand picked by a team of 19 year old blond California girls with amazingly tight bodies who will call you daddy-daddy, never ask what you are thinking or if their ass looks fat, and are working braless in a sweat shop in Beverly Hills. Truth be told, they are jiggling and sweating in their well worn tank tops right now, even though the air conditioner is blasting and it's way too cold in the room and their shirts are two sizes too small and, well... I think you know what I mean, if you know what I mean. 

Plus, its got old radio ads, public service announcements, and some other odd stuff.  Just like your real life! 

Strange, ain't it?

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A DRINKING AND EATING AND HAPPY AND THANKING AND GIVING DAY MIX (2019)

Gobble it up!

UNWRITTEN ZOMBIE CAT MOVIE (soundtrack)

Here's another one from the inside of my head. 
Go and make your own.  It's fun!

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UNWRITTEN VAMPIRE MOVIE (soundtrack)

The soundtrack to one of the movies that I have in my head.
I bet you have a couple in your head too.

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MUSIC BY BLAINE HOTEL (edit 5)

A techo-ish horror concept thing created by a couple of computer geek guys I know.

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 11 (movies)

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 10 (best of)

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 09 (can the media drive you insane?)

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 08 (haunted)

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 07 (assorted)

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 06 (vampires)

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 05 (science fiction)

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 04 (oldies)

Tunes for elders and such.

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 03 (assorted)

Here's another set for ya.

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 02 (assorted)

 

More of the same.

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MONSTRO MONSTER MIX 01 (assorted)

Halloween stuff for your ears and...  
um...  
well...  
just your ears, I guess.

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The Old Stuff Vol. 1

Some things I've written and read over the years.  Notes are included just in case you happen to be one of those more info types. 

Not that there's anything wrong with that. 

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